Tweet Relief: The T.J. Cloutier Experience

Ever wondered what it would be like to sit at a table with old school poker legend T.J. Cloutier?

If so, today was your lucky day as noted English pro Sam “TheSquid” Grafton drew Cloutier’s table at the 2013 WSOP and proceeded to document the entire experience using Twitter.

The result was sublime.

Some of the highlights include a story where a seagull stole a hotdog right out of Cloutier’s hands, players he refers to as “limper-dupers” and his name for pocket kings.

Don’t take it from us, however, check out Grafton’s brilliant Tweets about Cloutier in their entirety below. You won’t regret it.

TJ Cloutier just sat down. Boom! This is why you play WSOP events.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2nd hand he opens 5x. BB defends. He checks back A63 two tone. BB leads 2 on turn. Cloutier folds 99 face up. BB shows set of 6s. Baws.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

1.04 Cloutier reports that he ran his stack up to 30k in Seniors event but then got several bad beats.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

1.08 Cloutier engages in idle flirtation with the massage girl.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

1.10 Cloutier produces handful of cardprotectors from his pocket and selects one to use for the day.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

Said card-protector has picture of him on front and his luck hand J9cc on reverse. It was sent to him by a fan.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

1.59 Cloutier tells Doc Sands wife that she ‘Couldnt look like a man if she tried.’ Erica is obviously charmed by the septegenarian.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2.0w I isolate Cloutier with Q6cc. 3 way to flop. I cbet J63 he craises. I fold he shows a Jack. Boss.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2.38 Cloutier informs me that his wife was turned away from The Vic in London because she was wearing a corduroy pant suit.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2.41 Cloutier thinks France is dirty and Germany is clean.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2.51 Four way limped pot on TJ’s blind. He refers to the players as “limper-dupers”— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

2.52 On 732ss TJ donks from bb four way. He is raised and folds 55 face up. Raiser shows a set of deuces.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

Twice Cloutier has ordered a Diet Pepsi and a SEPARATE cup filled with ice. He decants the Pepsi on to the ice and takes sips between hands.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

FYI ‘Decant’ rates as one of my favourite words alongside ‘betwixt’ and ‘advantitious’— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

3.20 TJ opened utg and is flatted utg+1. He craises A25dd as initial raiser and after guy folds he shows top set.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

Cloutier informs us he played football in the Canadian league and that once in a park in Vancouver a seagull snatched a hotdog from his hand— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

3.54 Big moment as Cloutier addresses me directly. He tells me he hasn’t seen my hands he’s just seen me “raise and run”— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

Spare seat taken by @coreyburbick. Cloutier’s assesment is “We might beat him, but it doesn’t look like he’ll give em away.”— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

4.10 Erica shows down KK and Cloutier tells us he likes to call it “the magnet hand”— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

“Go ahead and take a breath now” – TJ Cloutier to @SquidPoker— corey burbick (@coreyburbick) June 15, 2013

4.55 TJ opens my blind 3.5x. Announces “ocho” after I fold and shows two eights. Burbick yet to contribute anything meaningful to the table— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 15, 2013

5.04 Check back QQ8. Limper turns straight with J9. TJ “Those turn card’s will eat you alive if you let em.” Still nothing from Burbick.— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 16, 2013

5.10 Started “muttering” withered out of the side of my mouth every time Burbick folds in the hope of coaxing my hero out of his lethargy— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 16, 2013

5.31 Shove over limper and show 55. Ask TJ for his thoughts – You won the pot didn’t ya? You can only judge someone by the hides on the wall— Sam Grafton (@SquidPoker) June 16, 2013